update..

Havent written in a while, felt too down.

I just have to add, my life is great! LOL
I mean, its easy to think im pathetic and this is all i think about, but the blog IS called "my messy breakup" right?

Actually, things are looking better.

So many things around me are great that i cant let A and D pull me down completely. School, party, dance, friends, my cats, my birthday coming up in two days, me still being hotter than a mutha when i go out and gettin "mad burn" as my NY sister would say. Apparently that means the men show you love in the club.....lol
And Q, she´s a great friend right now. Since she is A´s best friend, but has now stepped back from her and feel like she wants to "break up" with her. It makes me feel like im not completely wrong in my hate for A and D. They suck.

i went to the party. Both of them were there. I ignored A and she ignored me. Someone said "here is D, you know him right? " i just looked at him and said "yes".

but of course, with alcohol and emotions runnin wild, at the end of the night things were a bit different. I had cussed D out, screaming at the top of my lungs, and A said to me when we were confronted with eachother "why am i even talking to you, you turned all my friends against me". yeah, I turned them against you... Like you didnt do that by your damn self. when i came to the party, all your friends looked at me and asked how i was feeling and proceded to look at me with doggy eyes saying they heared what happened and felt bad for me. So A, you turned them against you by your damn self, i didnt even have to add to my case. A strong fuckin case that is.

but i had a good time at the party before all this went down. D stayed out of my way, so did A. but as i have mentioned before, the fact that they went there, both of them, is appaling to me.

So at this point, my sadness has turned into hate and discust. More discust than anything, i feel like throwing up when i think of them together.

The bad thing is i feel like getting even. I dont give a shit about her, she is lonley anyway. but him, i have some things, passwords...i could get even if i wanted to. He promised me my money back (can u believe he still owes me cash? and is in no hurry to pay that shit back?) more than three weeks ago, and i still havent seen them. so i emailed him today, lets see what he answeres.